Hi marriedtoajw,
The truth is that you can't save anybody else until you save yourself.
Right now it is almost like you want them to wake up so that YOU feel better.
I can appreciate the way this pains you, and I will admit that I personally have not gone through anything like this.
People who survive calamities sometimes - maybe often - suffer "survivor's guilt." It might help if you can discuss your feelings with a psychologist who has some training or experience in PTSD or cult deprogramming. There's not much point in talking to a counselor who is looking at you as though you were something he's never seen before.
I *did* have the experience of having a psychiatrist FALL ASLEEP while I was blathering away. In a way, even that helped me a little; more than any of the meds ever did! Ever notice that many times the side effects of the popular psychiatric meds is to make the patient depressed, fat and disengaged? try to resist meds if you can.
On the other hand, don't refuse the meds - they might help. Keep a diary (it can be encrypted on your computer if you have problems with family snoops) and record how you're feeling and what you're thinking each day... not a "stream-of-consciousness" monologue; that would take 24x7x365 - just a summary of major themes so you can review them from time-to-time too SEE if there has been some improvement. It's too easy to trick yourself into thinking that the wqay you feel now is the way you've "always felt."
Find comfort in the knowledge that others have freed themselves and you can too. Then you will be an example to your family.